Alternative title: Mommy and daddy will sleep when they are dead.
Jocelyn is a really great baby. She's a good sport at bath time, she's a great eater, she's super cute, she was even a good sport getting her temperature taken at the doctor today.
But her days and nights are swapped. I know that this is common - common enough to be covered in all the books with lots of tips and tricks. So we are doing them all - keeping it dark at night during feedings and changings, no playing, just get to business and get to sleep, and then during the day the naps are in a brightly lit room and we make no efforts to keep quiet.
The problem is that she can't (or won't, rather) sleep in her crib at night. She will sleep, but only if it is on one of us. We will try to put her down, and she may sleep in her crib for maybe 5 minutes (one night as long as 30 minutes), but then sure enough she's up and howling. The second we pick her up, she quiets. Thus, she only wants to be loved on (and who would want to deprive an infant of love!).
So Hubby-poo and I been sleeping in 2-3 hour shifts, taking turns holding Jocelyn. This goes on from about 11 or so (although, the 11-1 or 2 shift isn't too bad since Hubby-poo's still up) and ends around 7 or 8. Then she goes down in her crib and we can sleep until about 11 or so.
So the nurse practitioner at the pediatrician's office gave some advice - just DON'T hold her until she falls asleep and let her sleep in our arms. It's just forcing bad habits that will be hard to break later. I asked her what we should do instead, and she said to let her cry it out. I don't know that I will be doing that so early (she's only 7 days old - she can't even suck her thumb yet, how can she self-soothe?). But I may try to let her cry a bit longer, with a set crying time (let her cry for 5 or 10 minutes before going to get her), and see what happens. Maybe once she goes through a cry cycle she'll be able to sleep. Let's see if my heart can take it. Or Hubby-poo's. I am pretty sure he is a bigger softy for her than I am.
Tonight's the experiment. She's in her crib right now. I'm crossing my fingers!!!
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4 comments:
Hey!
Don't know if it will help, but at least it will let you know you aren't the only one out there. http://www.zenproof.com/findingzen/ My friend Stella's blog. She had her baby last September. Give Jocelyn a big hug from me!!
Good luck with the sleeping thing. Nathan didn't sleep in his own bed until he was 16 months old, and still (at 3.5 yrs) doesn't usually sleep through the night. I hope you can find a solution that works for you. From what I've read, sleep training may not "work" for a few months. If you're really having trouble and don't mind paying money, I recommend Dana Obelman (sp?) Sleep Sense program. It really helped us a lot - I wish I hadn't waited so long to try it.
But it is true what they say, at least it was for us, if the baby falls asleep in arms and wakes up alone, she'll want to be in arms again to go back to sleep. Once she learns to go down alone, the longer periods will come. Nathan would not lay in his crib or on his back at all, only in his car seat or with me. I wish I had checked for reflux or something, but I was having "new mom" syndrome.
Feel free to message me if you need anything. I had a very rough first year and I'm happy to help if you can benefit from my experience. Hugs Mama, you've got a beautiful little girl there!!
Thanks, Michelle. Right now she definitely needs arms for falling asleep. But for now I am more concerned about her sleeping in her crib at all (which we have had much better luck with these past few nights). We will work on getting her to fall asleep in it in due time. Since I am nursing, she usually falls asleep while I'm burping her. That said, when she wakes up between feedings, we need to get up.
Thanks for the program tip. We may look into it if our current program doesn't work (which isn't supposed to kick off until she's 2 weeks old anyway).
I'm surprised they would recommend cry-it-out for such a young baby. She can't really be spoiled or trained so young! Dr. Spock+Dr. Sears has a lot to say on sleeping that is good I think. (None of major books recommend that you just let them scream until they sleep)
(And you'll find that every time you break any habit..like if she's sick... you'll have to start over from scratch with any sleep training anyway..)
Good Luck!
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