Monday, July 29, 2013

Where did the last 18 months go?

And, for that matter, the last 3 months where I have not posted about Donovan's progress or life.  Whoops.  I have been busy.  Too busy being an awesome mom to document it, I guess :-P.

Anyway, my boo is 18 months old!  We haven't been to the doctor yet, so I don't have his stats (appointment is next week, so we won't be missing it).  But he seems big for his age.  I mean, people always ask if he and Jocelyn are twins, and she just turned 3! 

His vocabulary has blown me away.  I know you are not supposed to compare and contrast your children, but he knows WAY more words than Jocelyn did at this age.  Ah, second-borns.  With both a role model to follow after, as well as a diminished amount of dedicated attention, and thus a need for greater self-sufficiency.  I think it's mostly the role model thing, as Donovan tries to do everything that Jocelyn does.

But, seriously, his vocabulary is amazing.  He can say everything.   He tries every word.  I made a black bean and couscous salad, so he said 'couscous! bean!' when he wanted some.  He can name all of his stuffed animals (Donald, Daisy, 'mouse' for both Mickey and Minnie, Duck, Goose, Lamb, Snoopy, Bear, Giraffe, Horse).  If he doesn't know a word, he asks what it is, and then repeats it when we tell him.  Yesterday, he pointed to a bowl of Cheetos (we had friends over, we don't just have Cheetos out all the time) and asked, 'bean?'  I told him, 'no honey, those are Cheetos.'  So he repeated,'Cheeto.  Eat?'  Well, how could I say no to that? 

He has some words that he can't quite pronounce yet, but he says them so cutely that I don't want him to ever outgrow them.  Jocelyn is 'Donny', ketchup and syrup are 'kop-op' and 'sop-op', respectively.  Drink is 'dink'.  

He is also starting to get complex concepts - like possession, and quantity.  He understands 'no more' and 'all gone' and can apply them to items (like 'no more milk' and 'no more cake').  He understands possession.  He knows it's mommy's shirt ('Mommy dirt!'), Jocelyn's water ('Donny water!'), or Daddy's phone ('Daddy Phone!').  He knows what noises are, and can usually identify where they came from ('Noise!  Outside!').  He understands that I have a red car, and has decided that every red car we pass on the street is "Mommy Car". 

He also understands everything, even if he chooses to ignore it.  He can take commands (throw this in the trash, bring this to daddy, put down the cup, eat your strawberries, etc.).  He also makes a lot of demands - 'dip' (sip, or dip, depending on context), 'bite', 'nurse', 'up', 'down', 'outside', 'bed'.  He is very interested in coffee - when he sees my mug, he yells, 'dip, coffee' (we always say no... but there was one time he dipped my iPhone in my coffee and licked the coffee off of the phone... bad on so many levels!).  He also loves to tell people and things to 'go away'.  We often tell the cats to go away (since they hover at meal times, looking for dropped food), so he has started yelling 'go away cats!' at them.  Jocelyn is sometimes afraid of the silly gilly gumbles, so we often have to yell at them to go away.  Donovan has started to help by yelling 'Go away dumbum!'. 

His giggles are still the best.  He is super ticklish.  And when I tickle him, he laughs with his whole body and proclaims, "tickle!".  It's awesome :-). 

I mentioned how he wants to be like Jocelyn - he is even trying to use the potty like she does!  Now, part of it is a 'me too / me first' sort of behavior - she announces that she needs to use the potty, and he runs in there to try to sit on it before she does (fully clothed, in diaper, etc.).  But we do let him sit on it occasionally, and he recently wanted to get out of the bath because he had to poop.  While on there, he peed!  It was Thursday (7/25).  We were so excited and proud of him!  We should start sitting him on the potty more regularly now, that way he can get a head start on this potty training business.  

We are having a few troubles, though.  He is still very violent.  He hits, pushes, pulls hair, bites, bonks, throws things, etc.  He mostly does it in fun - he likes when you yell ouch, it's funny to him.  And that I am hoping he outgrows.  But he also does it out of frustration.  He was mad at Jocelyn once, so he wandered over, grabbed my high heeled shoes off of the floor, and threw them at her.  Hard.  When he gets told no, he will pick something up, hurl it at the ground, and then do it again.  He hits and pulls hair when you have something he wants.  And if you tell him no, he will hit you in the face and pull your hair.  It's terrible.  The 'fun' hitting seems like a phase.  The angry hitting / acting out seems like an inability to control rage.  Since angry, violent men tend to run on both sides of our family (more directly in mine, and a bit further out on Mike's), I am nervous.  The things we have going for us are:  Mike is not a violent, angry man (I think I can count on one hand the number of times I have actually seen him mad), we role model peaceful mediation (for the most part.. sometimes our buttons get pushed).  So hopefully we can at least nurture out any violent tendencies that nature may have put there.  But I still get worried. 

That's the only real hiccup right now.  And hopefully the pediatrician will have some words of wisdom for us.  And, honestly, even with the violence, he is still a love.  He loves to hug and kiss.  After he hits, he is usually willing to say 'sorry' and knows that he should give a hug and a kiss.  So there is that. 

We have such an awesome little guy.  And I just love him so much.  I can't believe how lucky we all are sometimes :-).

Monday, July 8, 2013

Happy third birthday, Jocelyn!

My baby is 3 today.  It's crazy. I don't know where the time went, but isn't that always the way it goes?

I have done a terrible job of documenting things lately.  I have been busy, and it's a shame.  Because Jocelyn is potty trained!  She has been for about 4 weeks now.  One day she was just ready for the potty.  We made a sticker chart, we promised a Minnie Mouse toy when she got 5 stickers, and it worked.  And now she doesn't even care about the stickers.  She just uses the potty like it's no big thing.  Maybe I will write a dedicated post about it.  But this is not it.  It's just relevant, because it means she can move into the 3 year old classroom :-).

This post is about the tiny person who really showed me what love is.  As I have done every year on this date, I went back and reread her birth story.  Wow.  It just brings back a rush of memories.  That feeling of 'holy crap' that surrounded me when I first held her slimy body.  That feeling of 'holy crap' that continued for days, as we figured out life as parents.  I fell in love with her instantly.  Sometimes it takes longer, but it didn't for me and my girl. 

I can't believe this little girl she has grown into.  One thing that has never changed is that Jocelyn does things on her own terms.  She feels no obligation to anybody, and does not try to please you if she doesn't, in her heart, want to.  She's a hard audience - it's hard to amuse her, but the payoff is completely worth the effort because her laugh is infectious.  She loves with her whole heart.   Her favorite person is her daddy, with Donovan at a close second, and mommy in third.  But that's okay, because she is still crazy about me and probably needs me more than anybody else.  She also really, really loves her grandparents, aunts and uncles. 

Jocelyn is super smart.  I know that everybody thinks that their baby is a genius, and watching babies learn things is truly a magical thing.  But there are things that she just learns super fast.  Yes, she knew her alphabet and colors by the time she was 2, and according to the books she should just start picking those up now.  But she also knows quite a few states.  We have a map we look at (since I travel a lot for work, it's good to give her a visual of where I go).  She knows she lives in Texas, and where it is.  She knows that Grandma lives in Michigan, and where that is.  She also knows that mommy went to Wisconsin and Georgia recently, and can still point them out on the map ("Misconsin - Mommy went there for work").  She also points out that Wisconsin is right by Michigan.  She knows New Jersey (where Babcia, Uncle Omar, Grandpa, Uncle Jeff and Miss Janette live), she knows Washington DC (where Aunt Sarah and Uncle Pat live), and Florida (where Disney world is).  She also knows a few others, and sort of remembers other places where mommy and daddy have been for work.

These days, Jocelyn's favorite game is 'chase', which is sort of a cross between hide and seek and tag.  One of us hides, she and Donovan (and the non-hiding parent) look for us, and then when found, we chase the kids around the house while 'roaring' at them.  They think it's hilarious.  Of course, Jocelyn tries to hide and have us find her, but she doesn't quite get it. 

Jocelyn evidently has a favorite restaurant - California Pizza Kitchen.  We don't go there often... I'm pretty sure that prior to her birth, I could count the number of times I have been there on one hand.  But one day, a few months back, we had the carpets cleaned.  And it ran long, so when I picked up the kids from daycare, I didn't want to bring them to a house filled with workers and chemicals.  Mike stayed with the workers, and I took the kids to the mall.  I told them that I would take them to dinner at a good restaurant called California Pizza Kitchen and then we would play at the indoor playground.  We had a blast.  So the next time we asked her where she wanted to eat, it was California Pizza Kitchen.  And then a trip to the indoor playground.  We have been a total of 3 times now.  So, on the way to daycare this morning, when I asked her where she wanted to go out for her special birthday dinner, the answer was California Pizza Kitchen.  So that is where we are going tonight.

Jocelyn loves having us retell her stories.  After we read her stories at bedtime, we both have to tell her stories.  Sometimes it's recounting experiences we all shared (our day at Magic Kingdom or Animal Planet, Donovan's last birthday, etc.), sometimes it's talking about future events (her Little Gym birthday party), and sometimes it's events of the past that we had mentioned (that time when I walked in the Halloween parade as a little girl, or the story of when Mike was a toddler and made a mess with the Vaseline on his Barney Bear).  When we leave parts out, she reminds us of them.  She asks a lot of questions, and is very engaged in the stories.  It's wonderful. 

She probably gets way too much screen time, which I feel terrible about.  But she loves her Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and the Winnie the Pooh movie.  Those are in constant rotation these days.  She always wants to watch the Backson song in Winnie the Pooh (or, as she says, the Baxton part).  At least we only let her watch shows with good messages about being good sports, playing nice, etc.  And it reinforces  her knowledge of colors, shapes, etc.

But all of these books and videos do help feed her imagination.  She will tiptoe around because the giants are sleeping in her room, and we have to scare off the silly gilly gumbles before she can go to sleep, my yoga mat has been a train, a row boat, a hot air balloon... everything but a yoga mat these days :-P.  She makes us all sorts of culinary creations in her play kitchen - yesterday it was blueberry soup (thank goodness it was all fake food!). 

She loves to sing songs and play games together now.  Ring around the Rosy is probably her favorite game these days.  She wants everybody to participate.  She loves when Mike sings her "I've been working on the railroad,"  Because of that, when she talks about the giants, she will get confused and say "fee fi fiddle-i-o" instead of  "fee-fi-fo-fum."  It's really freakin' cute!  When she plays by herself, she is starting to sort of color objects.  Not necessarily with colors that make sense, or in the lines, but she will color all of the characters on a coloring book page the same shade of pink, and only the characters are colored.  So it's progress.  And she can draw a few letters (sort of).  It's awesome. 

She is becoming quite the busy body and tattle tale, though.  She acts as a second pair of eyes for us when Donovan is getting into trouble.  It's mostly helpful, but we need to be careful not to encourage too much tattling.  It's also a bit ironic, because she will demand "sorry"s and "thank you"s from him, but won't give them herself. 

Anyway, this has become more of a record and less of a celebration.  So let's circle it back.  These past 3 years have been amazing.  Being a parent is really freakin' hard, it's the hardest thing that Mike and I have ever tried to do.  These tiny people challenge us, try our patience, and push our limits every day.  The older she gets, the harder she gets in some ways (easier in others, of course).  But it's just so rewarding.  Watching my babies grow is the greatest gift I have ever received.  Feeling her tiny arms around me, having her cuddle up in my lap for comfort (or just for the love of it), getting hugs and kisses, reading stories together, playing together.. I wouldn't trade it for anything.  I love my little pooka bear, and I am so grateful to have her in my life.